Jonathan Sim
Few romantic comedies arrive with a hook as biting and as cathartic as You’re Dating a Narcissist!, a 2026 indie that blends sharp humor with painfully recognizable truths about modern relationships. Written and directed by Ann Marie Allison in her feature debut, alongside co-writer Jenna Milly, the film follows three women at different stages of love, all entangled in relationships that challenge their sense of self. Anchored by Marisa Tomei as Judy, alongside Sherry Cola (previously interviewed here by our own Joey Magidson), Ciara Bravo, Marco Pigossi, José María Yazpik, and Jonah Platt, the film navigates the chaos of romance with equal parts absurdity and emotional honesty.
From the outset, the project felt distinct to those involved, including Cola, who appears in the film as Diane, the close friend of Tomei’s character Judy. “Being opposite Marisa Tomei is a big deal. This script is refreshing; I’ve never seen this take on the big screen before. Ann Marie Allison, whom I adore, directed the film, and the script she and Jenna Milly wrote was so smart and different. The entire cast—Marisa Tomei, Sierra Bravo, Marco Pigossi, and José María Yazpik—is fantastic. This is an independent film we shot at the end of 2023, and it shows the powerful resilience of independent filmmaking. It hits theaters March 27th, and I can’t wait for people to see it.”
Working alongside Tomei proved to be both a joy and an education. “The chemistry between us in real life shows through the film because Marisa and I had a good time together. She is so fun to watch. Just seeing her work and watching the character come to life—the choices, the subtleties—I learned from her. I’ve evolved after this film just by watching her do her thing. We had so much fun, from hiding in the bushes with sprinklers going off to the scenes in our robes at the hotel. Bringing the stories of these women together is so relatable, no matter what stage of love you’re in.”
The film leans heavily into comedic set pieces, including one scene where Cola’s character gets a bit too drunk. “Well, I do have experience being drunk historically. There are things that are really bizarr acting-wise, things like kissing, waking up, falling asleep, or being high/drunk because you want them to be believable. There are many degrees of drunk—I’ve been ‘cruising,’ but I’ve also been ‘sloppy’ like my character, Diane, who said the darndest things with no regard for her surroundings. I had a blast riffing with Marisa and Marco in that scene. It’s one of my favorite scenes in the film for sure.”
Comedy itself operates differently on a film set than it does on stage, something that shaped the performance style throughout production. “One big difference is that when cameras are rolling and you say something funny, there won’t be laughter. You have to trust that it hit. When you make the cameraman laugh, that’s when you know it was a good one. There is a lot of crossover, though. Stand-up gives me being quick with riffs and the superpower of adapting because anything goes on stage.”
When asked about a sequel to her 2023 comedy movie Joy Ride, she said, “I would absolutely love it. Stephanie, Sabrina, Ashley, and I adore each other; we’re family forever. The same goes for the writers, Adele Lim and Cherry Chevapravatdumrong. It’s definitely set up for a sequel, and now that it’s on Netflix, new people are discovering it. Hopefully, there will be a demand for it because I’m down.”
Beyond the humor, the film carries a deeper sense of representation and inclusivity. “Our stories are for everyone; the cultural specifics are just a bonus. In You’re Dating a Narcissist!, I am representing as an Asian and queer person. It means a lot to be able to exist.”
For Allison, the story’s origins are intensely personal. “I wish I could say it was divine inspiration, but unfortunately, I dated a narcissist in my 20s. It was a tumultuous and dramatic relationship that affected me for years. I couldn’t put my finger on what happened until a friend went through a divorce. Her therapist chased her down in a car and told her, ‘Your husband is a raging narcissist, and you need to run.’ The more she talked about the ‘narcissistic playbook,’ I had a light bulb moment: that’s what happened to me. I had struggled with shame and guilt for ten years, and once I realized what it was, a weight was lifted. I felt I had to write something about it. My writing partner at the time helped me write the first draft, and I’ve been trying to make this movie for almost a decade.”
That personal experience shaped how the film balances authenticity with storytelling. “Research shows there is a playbook for narcissistic abuse: idealize, devalue, discard. At first, they idealize you, and you feel like you’ve found your soulmate. Then they start to devalue, gaslight, and triangulate you. I wanted to infuse the movie with that reality while balancing it with a story about the people who get wrapped up in these relationships—who are often kind, smart, and emotionally intelligent empaths. As the character Judy says, these aren’t necessarily Disney villains. They are your neighbors, bosses, or parents. But when it’s your intimate lover, it’s a train wreck.”
Getting this original romantic comedy to the screen proved to be its own uphill battle. “It was really tough—it’s been like rolling a rock up a hill for the last four years. What really helped was getting the script to Marisa Tomei. She was at the top of my list because she combines comedic genius with vulnerability and deep emotion. Once we had Marisa, we got Sherry Cola, Ciara Bravo, Marco Pigosi, and José María Yazpik. The casting was a huge part of getting the movie made.”
Structurally, the film’s three interwoven narratives presented a unique challenge, one that ultimately led to a clearer emotional focus. “Yes, it was. My writing partner, Jenna Milly, helped me navigate the story of narcissism while focusing on the comedy. Laughter helped me get over my own issues with narcissistic people; it allows you to take a breath and stop the negative self-talk. The first few drafts felt more like an ensemble, but I eventually realized this is Judy’s story. I focused on her arc, her relationship with her daughter, her best friend, and how she navigates her own shame and guilt. I made this movie hoping to connect with people who have been through this and give them a little virtual hug.”
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