‘Star Wars: Skeleton Crew’ Episode Five Recap: “You Have a Lot to Learn About Pirates”

Warning: The following episode contains spoilers for the fifth episode of Star Wars: Skeleton Crew. 

After spending the past week watching day-to-day episode drops of What If…? – Season 3, I am back to my regularly scheduled programming of Star Wars: Skeleton Crew recaps (alongside Creature Commandos, which is airing at the same time). It was a true Marvel vs. DC vs. Star Wars battle on television, the likes of which I don’t think we’ve seen quite like this. To be honest, What If…? – Season 3, while mildly enjoyable, doesn’t hold weight to what Star Wars: Skeleton Crew (and Creature Commandos) has brought to the table, and this week’s episode, titled “You Have a Lot to Learn About Pirates,” is no different. 

Director Jake Schreier of the upcoming Thunderbolts* takes the reigns this time around and cuts back to Wim (Ravi Cabot-Conyers) and Fern’s (Ryan Kiera Armstrong) parents, Wendle (Tunde Adebimpe) and Fara (Kerry Condon), attempting to send a message out of the At Attin barrier. However, their attempt is caught by a droid, who will advise the supervisor before it is shut down. Fara tells Wendle that she is trying to appease the (unnamed and mysterious) supervisor but admits they may have to go behind their back to send a message beyond the barrier. The problem is that it could potentially expose them to reveal At Attin’s location, which has been carefully kept secret. 

Meanwhile, KB (Kyriana Kratter) has successfully reprogrammed SM-33 (Nick Frost) to prevent him from turning into a killing machine again. Fully conscious, he tells the kids, alongside Jod Na Nawood (Jude Law), that he knows where his former captain kept the coordinates to At Attin. We learn that his captain was named Tak Renrod and was thought to have found At Attin before never being heard from again (one may suspect him to be the supervisor since, by the time we get a glimpse of the pirate, his face is entirely hidden). 

SM-33 takes the crew to his old hiding ground, which he is shocked to learn has become a luxury spa. There, Jod is surprised to rekindle with Pokkit (Kelly Macdonald), a bounty hunter with whom he had a past life with “Dash Zentin” (another one of his many names). Initially stating that she is only here on holiday, Schreier eventually reveals that she is in close communication with the pirates whom we saw in the second episode. They are now on their way here to kill Jod and the children who he escaped with. 

A bumbling PG-rated chase ensues, with some admittedly fun moments of physical comedy, but the one crack Star Wars: Skeleton Crew has shown throughout its first five episodes has been how disinterested it seems in developing the pirates beyond bloodthirsty swashbucklers. You’d be forgiven not to know that Jaleel White and Alfred Molina are part of the pirate cast because none of the filmmakers linger on these side characters for very long. Of course, they’re not the main attraction of Skeleton Crew, Law’s character is. Still, it would’ve made moments of high-spirited tension much more effective if we spent just a (tiny) bit more time with them because their surprising acid-melting death (which we don’t see, so there may be a chance they’re alive) was met with little to no shock by myself. 

After a few trials that are plucked straight out of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade and The Goonies, the kids and Jod manage to foil the pirates and successfully enter Captain Rennod’s lair, where they find At Attin’s coordinates and learn that the treasure on their planet is a mint that can create an infinite supply of credits. As Jod assimilates this information, the kids remind him that he has made a deal with them and should honor his promise of bringing them back home. 

Instead, he challenges, per the pirate code, to fight to the death with its current captain, Fern, and forces her to yield instead of killing her. After much resistance (including Wim attempting to attack Jod with a lightsaber but opening it from the wrong end), Fern ultimately yields, and the kids are to be taken as prisoners. Before that, however, Wim activates a booby trapdoor, to which they are sent to an undisclosed location, figuring out what their next move is after Jod’s (predictable but welcomed, since it all built up to this very moment) betrayal. But the episode ends before we find out what they will do next. 

We do, however, get a shot of Jod picking up the lightsaber, which, coupled with his force sensitivity, does not spell good news for the children. With Bryce Dallas Howard directing next week’s episode, the chances that Star Wars: Skeleton Crew continues its momentum of greatness are extremely high. 

The fifth episode of Star Wars: Skeleton Crew is now available to stream on Disney+.