Steven Prusakowski
The two-part HBO documentary Pee-wee as Himself is so full of life and joy at times it is easy to set aside the sad fact that Pee-wee is no longer with us. The film peels away the artist’s much guarded facade to deliver an extremely emotional, insightful look at a comic genius, Paul Reubens, from his early days, diving deep into the rise, fall and rise again of Pee-wee Herman, right up to his last days.
Director Matt Wolf captures the spirit and the sadness of a man who just wanted to entertain. While Reubens is a much more complex person than his silly persona, at his core that is who he was, a man driven by the need to release his creativity and longing for the chance to make others laugh. As I started the documentary, I did so with more exposure to the man than most probably have, through an event where for the first time I really learned about the person behind the persona.
It was at a New York Comic Con panel which I was lucky enough to sneak into at the last minute even though it was at capacity. As soon as Reubens started speaking, I was immediately captivated. It was the first time I had ever seen him completely set aside the show biz side of himself and listen to his self-aware stories, which often revolved around his work, other celebrities and his chronic “souvenir collecting” – he would leave most projects with some sort of memento. It was hilarious, insightful, and a moving 60 minutes. It was, and is, one of my favorite of all panels or events I have attended. The panel closed out with a touching thank you to the fans and by sharing his genuine appreciation of his work and him.
Little did I know then he was already diagnosed with cancer. A few years later, in 2023, he passed away before anyone even knew he was sick. I thought this would be the most we would ever learn about Reubens from the man himself.
When the Pee-wee as Himself doc was announced, it came as a true surprise. I did not know what to expect, but knew if it was anything like the panel it would be fascinating, especially with the knowledge of his passing. The documentary exceeded anything I would have expected. It digs, sometimes penetrating deeper into the man’s soul than you would expect, revealing sides of Reubens that are not as polished or prepared.
Through clips selected from over hours of archive footage including his earliest days entertaining others, the development of characters, his journey into improv and eventually the birth of Pee-wee Herman. As you watch it is tough to not think that he was destined to become Pee-wee as much of his identity was creating others for him to play. Fans of Pee-wee will adore the inside look at the character, the playhouse and the films. There is genius at work every second, his split identity hidden behind an iconic comedy character with a short haircut and a bowtie.
What separates this from other post death docs relying on archive footage alone accompanied by the words of the subjects friends, family and acquaintances, this doc sits us down directly with Reubens to help narrate. It is incredibly intimate as Reubens himself narrates much of his own story directly to the camera, allowing viewers to look into his soul and at times it feels like vice versa. A face to face confessional where all would be revealed.
He had a way of telling a story and it quickly became evident that was much more than Pee-wee (though Pee-wee is amazing) and the man we isolated with was letting it all out knowing, unbeknownst to even the director, that these were his final days. Knowing that makes the already poignant hit even harder. When someone passes, the regret of not talking more, listening more, asking more weighs heavy on your soul. Here it is kind of the reverse perspective, where Reubens lets it all be bared because no one realizes how little time is left.
What you do not get is a sugar-coated look at the man, as there are numerous moments where he comes across a bit bitter about the treatment he received as well as his ongoing battle with the director. Being the controlling, creative mind he is, Reubens does not hold back as he challenges the direction of the doc and even serves as his own director at times grabbing the reins and flinging a few insults. It is surprising at times, but somehow (maybe because we know how sick he was at the time) it is easy to forgive and move on.
A must-watch for fans of Pee-wee as well as creativity as a whole. It does not pull punches and puts on display some of the ego and control issues that damaged friendships as well as the controversies that haunted him as he went from a pop culture hero to a punchline to a pariah.
For some the opening 60 minutes may be overkill and may lead to some fast forwarding from lesser fans to the Pee-Wee birth. The second explores his vast collection of odd memorabilia, vintage toys, film props, and set “souvenirs” from his projects then dives into the many lows in his life. An infamous visit to an adult theater led to the loss of his children’s program and depression. The downward spiral story continues, revealing the little known facts about the obscenity charges that almost completely ended his career. His defense coincidentally ties into the souvenir collector side of him that he shared during his NYCC panel.
Ultimately, it feels as if watching a court case, putting on trial those who murdered his image. One last attempt to set the record straight, to redirect his legacy. And like a trial, the words and memories of the victim who had since passed, are the main testimony. The subject of his long rumored queerness is touched upon, but ultimately kept private and tucked away, sadly to prevent it hurting his career. When it was revealed, it became the basis of the homophobic witch hunt that tarnished his image and haunted him until his dying days, accusing him of horrific crimes – something he was never able to shed.
It is heartbreaking. You realize that, until now, we only knew so little about hiding behind the beloved character. And still, even after viewing, though the understanding is stronger, we most likely still only know a portion of who he was. Sadly, this is all we will ever have to find out. For decades we barely got a glimpse and only were given more access when it was too late. You have to hope enough people see this to cleanse him of the sins he did not commit. While not a perfect man, he did not deserve what he was put through.
The closing moments shattered me. Having been through my share of losses over recent years, the final goodbye hits as if he were a lifelong friend, which is exactly what he felt like to millions.
It is difficult enough to process the idea of a life cut short by death, but also heartbreaking to watch an artist cheated of the opportunity to use his limited time doing what he wanted most, to entertain and bring glee and his creativity to everyone. RIP, Paul. You succeeded.
SCORE: ★★★★1/2 out of five stars
Pee-wee As Himself premieres on Max on May 23rd.
Comments
Loading…